Barbara Solomon Healing
Whispers From The Light: My Take on Love and a Balanced Life
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|Posted on November 22, 2017 at 1:30 PM||comments (21685)|
Hello. I haven’t had many interesting insights lately, until last week. I was reading an email from a longtime friend about her expected Thanksgiving dinner tussle with family. When I read, “I’m not going to stress anymore cause I know I have no control in this sitch and they have to work it out…” my heart sang! She's getting it!
Letting go of what you can’t control is a very important step towards claiming peace and power. (She had a lovely time, by the way)
She suggested that I write a blog about family and the holidays, how they are supposed to bring family together, not pull them apart. It was a good idea, but what came to me instead was not your relationship with your family, but what’s your relationship with yourself?
I think of life as a journey along a winding path; in my case within a lightly forested area but it can just as easily be along an open highway or even through a busy mall. Doesn’t matter…what matters is whom do I want to accompany me along that trail? Would I welcome myself as a traveling companion? Am I easygoing & enjoyable or drama-trauma focused? It's easy to get caught up in that swirl of chaos...sometimes it feels kinda exciting! But how does it leave me feeling?
I remember watching an old Kung Fu TV episode when David Carridine’s character was caught in a cave with a fearsome dragon. He told the dragon (paraphrasing here) that he knew it was a figment of his imagination and he wasn’t going to let it get him or his power. After a bit of concentration, the dragon vanished! Wow, I was so impressed!
To me, it was evidence of having some influence over things that may seem outside of our control. True, they may not change as quickly as within an hour TV show, but I've found that what you focus on and send your energy to does determine outcome to a significant degree.
Do I want to focus on turmoil, gloom and doom or glorious, light and love filled experiences? The decision is mine and mine alone! Yes, there may be some unpleasant things happen, but shall they claim ALL of my attention or do I note it, deal with it if need be, and move on to something more cheerful and fulfilling? Only I can decide where to aim my gaze.
I can also decide how I wish to react and respond to others, but know I can't control them any more than I wish them to control me. Which is not at all!!
I realize this, usually, and repeat it to myself (over & over) when I do wish to control someone near & dear to me (for their own good, of course). Yes, this still happens and I have to be OK with that, too; none of us are perfect.
But, even though I'm not even close to being perfect, I still have so much to be thankful for. To me, that’s a gift that I’m grateful to understand. It’s been a long time coming, and there’s still much to learn...but I’m getting there! And loving every step.
Hope everyone had a lovely Thanksgiving, but if not, there's always next year. Or tomorrow, to enjoy your lovely day.....or what about right now!
Love, Peace and Light
|Posted on July 11, 2017 at 4:05 PM||comments (3553)|
Do I have anything worthwhile to share today? Not sure, but let’s see what crops up…I recently attended an Abraham Hicks seminar and found it very inspiring!
Inspire – what an interesting word. Some definition’s: “to effect, move, or guide by divine or supernatural influence”, “To stimulate to action; motivate”, “To cause (someone), or be the cause, towards a particular feeling; affect or touch”.
Some archaic meanings: “to breathe or blow into or upon: to infuse (something, such as life) by breathing … inspired into him an active soul … — Wisdom of Solomon 15:11”. And, of course, “to inhale”.
To me, in some ways all these meanings are similar. They suggest an action that creates a sense of lightness; a movement towards something that is wispier, flimsier, and more buoyant than we are. Something that is kind of airy, both physically and energetically.
So, what to do with this inspiration? How can I lighten my load, and the load of others around me? First, I think, by listening with an open heart. Not thinking of what I’m going to say next, just listen! Absorb what is being said without trying to “fix” it (hard for me, for sure!).
Just “be” with someone. We are human be-ings after all; we are called that for a reason. Yet, I find it hard to just “Be” at times. And what does it even mean?
For me, it’s sitting quietly and opening, merging & accepting, with what brings me joy; thinking of things that offer delight and satisfaction. Allowing myself to feel unconditional love, maybe hearing a child’s gleeful laughter or placing myself on a warm beach; I’m just filling me up, full of “good stuff”. Connecting with what Created me.
Then, I’m ready to continue on with my day with a feeling of peace, strength and assuredness inside & slightly behind me. It’s like it’s carrying me. I’m able to call on it when things feel “twingy”.
If something gets out of whack, that’s OK, my armor is on and protecting me. I know it will all turn out OK, no matter what. That is such a nice feeling, comfortable and sure.
It makes taking the time to reflect, to just “be”, worth it, the payoff is huge!
Thank you all, if you have any interest in this…
With Peace, Light & Love,
Oh, if anyone is interested in finding out more about Reconnective Healing, I’m assisting at a presentation at New Renaissance Bookshop, NW 13th, on 7/18 from 4 – 5 PM. Thanks
|Posted on June 17, 2017 at 1:20 PM||comments (18994)|
A friend was telling me how her ex was lamenting that everything wrong in his life was her fault.
It’s so easy to blame someone for our unhappiness…it’s not easy to take action to change things. It’s a tough decision.
Do I continue in my misery or step into the unknown? We all have choices, even when we feel limited by the options available.
I, like so many today, am very discouraged to think about what’s happening with our democracy and the state of our governing bodies.
It’s easy to get angry and blame those "Washington folks we love to hate"…it’s all their fault, right?
But, as I mentioned to my friend, when we blame, we give away our power. Chronic blame is a waste of energy, a reason to wallow and remain stuck. It’s a drain on potential. And (most importantly) a guarantee that we’ll continue to feel badly.
When I’m trapped in the blame mind set, it’s very hard to move forward. If I can turn blame into positive action, that can be a powerful stepping stone towards satisfaction. Accomplishment. Purpose.
I don’t mean shooting Republicans at baseball practice because "they’ve screwed me"…that’s not positive action. I mean working on myself within.
Even if it’s a struggle to connect with the deeper me, even if it’s only for 5 minutes a day, I have to take the time to find my Light within. To connect with what some call God, Source, Creator, or the dao.
I don’t care what it’s called; I care how it feels. Pure Bliss! Love and being loved.
I listen to the whispers that come through. This helps to guide me towards the next steps to take. It offers me the knowledge and understanding that I have the ability to be my own happiness. No matter what’s happening in the world of politics, culture or even the weather.
If the world’s going to hell in a handbasket, do I want to feel terrible or do I want to feel good? I can still be an activist, make a difference in things that matter to me and not have to feel stressed all the time.
I needn’t harbor anger, I can use that anger energy to create something positive and move towards peace. I would rather feel relief and contentment than be angry and seething. I’ve done enough of both to know which feels better!
Some may think this is an unrealistic Pollyanna view. Perhaps, but it’s one I prefer. As I mentioned in an earlier post, it can be the best of times or the worst of times, and it’s probably both. I get to choose which I focus on.
With Love & Light,
|Posted on June 2, 2017 at 12:30 AM||comments (2214)|
I haven’t written for a while because I did not feel that I had anything to share. I have been busy, at times bordering on the feeling of being somewhat overwhelmed, and have just felt off, like something was out of balance.
This morning I decided to listen to a guided meditation, first time in a while. Wow, did that help! Why did I wait so long? Maybe, like a persimmon that’s sunning on a tree, I wasn’t quite “ripe” yet. Today, I guess I was.
During the meditation, I had the opportunity to have a conversation with my higher self, explore a fear I was experiencing that I was totally unaware of. I paused the CD and spent time allowing myself to feel what was bubbling up, and then address it.
I talked through my feelings and listened to the responses that came naturally back to me.
This helped me understand that I was still holding onto some beliefs that did not serve me, carried from past experiences that were horrific.
I asked myself what I was “living” during that awful period. My response: I was in a really negative space, constantly ruminating over how bad my life was, angry and feeling hopeless about my situation. I could not let it go.
My next question to self, "Then what did I expect to receive, living with, carrying around that attitude?" After all, what we feed grows!
Fortunately, I have been able to lay down that load and when I need a reminder that it’s oh so easy to pick it up again, I’m now more aware when something feels out of alignment.
I am so grateful for (and send a big Thank You to) my family and friends and for the resources that I surround myself with (like the guided meditation CDs) that whisper to me while I reach for the light.
It gets easier each time, to recognize, although I guess it’s always lurking out there somewhere. Life is a journey and the journey matters more than the destination. I'm finding peace, contentment and joy on mine, more frequently and with less effort. I'm laying down my load...I guess this is what I'm supposed to share.
With Love and Light,
|Posted on May 10, 2017 at 6:55 PM||comments (17255)|
It’s so easy to feel discouraged. It’s not always so easy to get back into the flow; find the swirl of light, beauty, and ease that awaits us.
How to climb back to the light? That is the age old question many of us grapple with, sometimes more often than not.
I think this is how religions began, from us trying to regain a sense of one-ness, connectedness that we once experienced.
When I was about 3 or 4 years old, my uncle got married & then his wife became pregnant. I wondered “Where were we before we were born? And, how does god know when to send one of us out (as a baby)?”
I thought it was “The Kiss” (you may kiss the bride) that triggered it…
I asked my dad about these things. He became very quiet; I could tell he was uncomfortable, he finally told me to go ask my mother.
Maybe I should have, she gave me some interesting information in those days (like how a neighbor’s strawberry allergy was related to emotions) that she later denied doing, but I got the impression that this was a topic that was probably best left unexamined. Too bad; looking back, I wonder what she would have shared.
A friend in elementary school showed me her copy of the “I Ching”, and although neither of us really understood what it all meant, we were fascinated by its cryptic messages.
We tried meditating. I didn’t know what to do with it, but found it an interesting exercise. I usually ended with “My mind is finally clear! Oh, now it’s not!” and felt like a failure, but intrigued.
During that period, I had curious experience that led me to suspect that we went past the end of our fingers/toes. There was more to us than what met the eye.
Yet, what to do with this knowledge? I know that for me, one reason I used to self-medicate was to try to find that deeper whatever, and let loose of this physical self that didn’t feel so good…the one I didn’t feel that comfortable with.
Fortunately, I’m now able to reconnect with that deeper self via meditation, energy modalities, prayer, chanting and other means that are more healing. Unexpectedly, a nice side effect was my feeling more at home with my physicality and appreciating the person who I am.
One day I realized that others probably respected me more than I did myself and finally understood how silly that was. How could they all be so wrong about me? Maybe I just needed to reexamine my own opinion.
Marianne Williamson reminds us that we all are shining lights and to suppress that is to deny our nature, which withholds our gifts from all.
It’s not egotistical to believe I have value. It’s smart! It’s generous and kind. When I share my Self with others, I am offering them my light as a beacon, a whisper, a reminder of who they are…another Light. It’s what we can do for each other.
Peace & Light,
Thank you for reading, feel free to comment & share.
|Posted on April 26, 2017 at 10:35 AM||comments (1269)|
Life is so humbling!!
Oh, the ups & downs of existence, sometimes a bumpy road, other times its smooth sailing all the way. Why is that?
Last week I got sick for the first time since I can’t remember. In fact, Dean stated he could not remember my getting sick in the 4+ years that I’ve known him. Luckily, it didn’t last long but felt like it was forever!
Although I finally got around to doing some acupuncture & using essential oils the next day, I forgot to follow my usual courses and life got twisted. It was such an extraordinary feeling. Writing this blog has usually helped me maintain a smooth course, but I somehow hit a bump all right!
OK, how to climb back to the peace & light? When you’re feeling badly, either physically or emotionally, it’s a challenge to aim for the high road, to want to propel yourself, to remember to open and allow. It’s so easy to fold in and spiral down.
I just rememberd an event from years ago…I was having a very bad time with my first husband & we were separated. Our young son was experiencing the effects of our marital discord and cried a lot. I felt guilty over his distress.
I was feeling stuck in my job, my employer had promised me certain things that weren’t happening and she was full of excuses that rang false to me. I was so unhappy with my life!
One morning, ruminating on how awful everything was I thought, “what could be worse than this?” Ha!! Within seconds the phone rang and it was the police!
I was told that a car that had been owned by us was used by a drunk driver and had crashed into 4 cars that were parked, luckily no one was hurt.
I responded that we had sold the car a few weeks earlier but the policeman replied that since the new driver hadn’t registered it and the title was still in our name, we'd have to pay to repair all the wrecked cars! I told him I had a sales receipt signed by the new owner to prove we had sold the car but he stated it didn’t matter, we were legally responsible.
I gulped and said that somehow I’d figure out a way to make payments. I hung up and almost started crying…but then I began laughing.
I realized this was the universe's way of letting me know, what could be worse? Oh, plenty. I suddenly understood that I could make a choice, to either continue to spiral down into the darkness or make a change.
I chose change. At lunch I went out & found a resume service (this was back in the 80s).
The fellow said my background and experience, which I thought was really pathetic, was actually rather positive. He assured me he’d be able to come up with a resume that was favorable and I even though I didn’t totally believe him (I figured he said that to everybody), I left his office feeling more hopeful.
After lunch I turned in my notice and felt even better! I called a temp agency who said they'd love to talk with me and things continued to feel upbeat. In addition to the temp agency I found a part time job that offered the flexibility and stability that I needed to deal with the other aspects of my life.
I understood that it was my choosing to move towards the light that elevated me and directed me towards more of what I wanted. Oh, and I never heard back from that policeman. He was definitely a whisper from the Light.
One day, I was feeling unsure and asked god to give me a sign that all was well. I was on a hilltop and looked out over the Portland skyline. I saw a cloud that looked like the most ridiculous thing. I don't remember what it was, I just know that I burst out laughing. I had my sign. Lighten up!
This past week I had been struggling somewhat to find my equilibrium….but writing this posting has helped me regain balance. I"m back in the flow....and humbly grateful.
Thanks to all who read it. You’re also part of my healing process.
With Peace & Light,
|Posted on April 19, 2017 at 7:25 PM||comments (9451)|
For a while I set appointment times on my calendar to be reminded of how many things I have to feel grateful for & how lucky I am. Now, I can more naturally find ways to remember this, and engage my whole being in the feeling, allowing it to become a visceral response.
This seems to help it be more than just an activity; it becomes part of my internal landscape, my energetic makeup. During these moments of revelation, I don’t rush through it, but take time to “try it on”, like I’m trying on a new set of clothing.
I allow myself time to fully experience what it feels like to Revel in Peace, Joy, Unconditional Love (so powerful!), Contentment.
My body becomes familiar with what it is like to be relaxed, calm and fully supported by a force stronger than itself. This is becoming more my normal state, yet I continue to reinforce it as often as possible.
Oh, things still don’t always work out as I plan, but when that happens, I find I don’t have knee jerk reactions like I was prone to do in the past. I can sit with something and ponder the best approach, not assume the worst, and try to take varying perspectives. I ask my deeper self the best next step and often find the response makes sense.
For me, actively altering my physical apparatus from being tense, vigilant and wary to relaxed, open and allowing has helped me to be able to live from a happier place. Find more satisfaction and joy. Be more mindful of the Now. It’s really not hard to do; the hardest thing is remembering…which is why I set my calendar.
The good news is there's nothing really that different about me, if I can do it, anyone can!
|Posted on April 11, 2017 at 11:20 AM||comments (7367)|
Back in 1970, shortly after I got my driver's license, I returned home from a Friday night out with their car to find my parents in front of the 11 o'clock news, in obvious distress. They gave me such an uncharacteristically warm welcome, I asked what was going on.
They replied they had just seen a report of a teenager who had died in a car accident and thought perhaps it could have been me. This accident occurred in a part of town that I had never even been in; I don't think I even knew where it was located. So I asked them why in the world, with all the teenage drivers out there, they thought that could have been me. They responded emphatically “Could have been, you never know!"
During the following years, I've spent a lot of time pondering my life in general and my time with them. I figured that because they lost their first child at 10 days (1950, my Dad drove her with a nurse from Magee Hospital to Children's, but it was too late, no NICUs then) and the stories they were raised on, (like how my paternal grandmother hid in her cellar while a slaughter raged in the village above her) their default attitude was probably "Could have been, you never know!" with a very negative connotation. They always expected the worst; no big surprise that they both lived with chronic medical problems.
I remember thinking that night in front of the TV, "I'm never going to be like that!" It was one small step towards a more healing path for me.
Years later when my own son got his driver's license I understood my parent’s anxiety a bit more clearly. But, I chose not to give into the negtive expectations of "Could have been, you never know!"
If he was late for curfew, I realized that if I sat & stewed, it would only get later and later. But, when I gave it up to the Universe, stating something like, "He's yours now, please keep him safe. But, if something happens, I guess that's his path" allowing myself to, I guess you could call it surrender, within 5 minutes he'd walk in the door or call. It NEVER failed!
I began using it for other situations. When MAX was running behind schedule or I was stuck in traffic and knew I'd be late for class or an appointment, if I found myself feeling anxious, starting to sweat or thinking of excuses, I’d stop. I'd take a moment to ask the Universe to carry me to a positive outcome, and then relax, even if I had to force it a bit. Deep breaths….
Once, in spite of the allowing, I arrived about 10 minutes late to school. I was surprised with how un-upset I was, moving quickly but not rushing to class. As I was walking up the steps, my instructor came bounding up behind me, he was also late! I whispered my thanks.
Oh, there've been times when things don't turn out as I planned, stories for another day. But, when I remember not to buy into the "could have been, you never know" negativity and relax into the flow, allowing things to unfold as they will, even those unexpected outcomes have helped me glide along my path towards the light with ease and a sense of peace, joy and gratitude.
With Light & Love,
PS - Happy Passover, Glorious Easter & Joyful Spring Equinox to all!
|Posted on April 5, 2017 at 1:05 PM||comments (2594)|
With a tip of the hat to Charles Dickens, this is the best of times, this is the worst of times. So goes my mantra, or at least one of them. Which will I focus on? Will I wrench my hands, gnash my teeth & break my heart about the awful turn of events in the world these days? Oh, I easily could!
Should I think of my old dog Spanky, who,unless he was caught rummaging in the garbage, always looked me with pure joy in his eyes, picture a warm, sunny day on the beach or replay in my head the sound of a child’s gleeful laughter? Ahhh, doesn’t this feel much nicer?
Sure, external events are constantly at play, but how I respond to those events are my choice, and mine alone. Practices that I’ve been doing for years are paying off, helping me to remain in the now moment (for the most part, not always!), or return there more easily.
After the last post, I was thinking of writing next about Living and Dying, but that may be for another day. Today, it’s about finding my deeper self when I feel disconnected, restless, and unsure. Softening my inner critic and remembering to be gentle with myself becomes easier & easier the more I allow it.
The rough becomes smoother, the flow becomes more natural, and the ride fits better as I release resistance. I can sit and repeat to myself, “Release, relax, let go” with some slow, deep breaths which help me reach deep into my loving, center self. “Love peace, love peace...” is another…they reduce tension.
When I am relaxed, I find it easier to resolve conflict with more of a win/win approach, I"m more able to let things unfold on their own timeline and I’m quicker to let go of what does not serve me, since I can’t please everyone.
I also recall a part of the safety speech given just before takeoff, “Put your own mask on first before you help another”. There’s a reason for that instruction.
If I can’t properly take care of myself, I’m no good to all those who depend on me. And that would suck! I like being my best for them, and I’m slowly learning how to be, more & more each day by living with appreciation and gratitude.
With Peace & Light,
ps, I"m starting another 5 week Qi Gong class & Dean and I will be facilitating another Aging by Design workshop in Troutdale at end of April. Registration info coming soon.
|Posted on March 28, 2017 at 4:10 PM||comments (7167)|
Greetings Fellow Seekers,
It was suggeted a couple weeks ago that I write my perspectives on how I (try to) Live My Truth, share the ways I maintain my balance and why, so many years into this existance, I am finally so very, very happy.
How do I do it? Well, I've taken lots of baby steps, that's for sure! Each has built upon the other...and there have been more than a few times when I've tumbled backwards; gone far down into the darkness.
But hidden way inside my core, there's a beam of light that calls to me. Wants me. Teases me.
And connecting to this light helps me understand that we do not stop at the end of our fingers or toes...there is an energetic field that permeates us all and connects to the cosmos in a way we can't fathom with our minds but have a deep knowning with our hearts.
And when I began to allow this vibrational field to carry me, as it's meant to do, and stopped fighting against it, like I often did, I began to live a life of unbelievable peace, healing and harmony.
I look forward to writing again soon, sharing more details of the methods I use to find balance, and responding to your comments. Share your questions and ideas here, please.
With Peace & Light, Barbara